To everyone from the intern who made me oatmeal when I woke up at the hospital that morning, to the deputy who waited beside me, to the nurses who calmed me, to the detective who listened to me and never judged me, to my advocates who stood unwaveringly beside me, to my therapist who taught me to find courage in vulnerability, to my boss for being kind and understanding, to my incredible parents who teach me how to turn pain into strength, to my grandma who snuck chocolate into the courtroom throughout this to give to me, my friends who remind me how to be happy, to my boyfriend who is patient and loving, to my unconquerable sister who is the other half of my heart, to Alaleh, my idol, who fought tirelessly and never doubted me. Chanel Miller was born in the year 1993. What would have happened to me? You think thats what Ive spent the past year fighting for? I became closed off, angry, self deprecating, tired, irritable, empty. As the author Anne Lamott once wrote, Lighthouses dont go running all over an island looking for boats to save they just stand there shining. Although I cant save every boat, I hope that by speaking today, you absorbed a small amount of light, a small knowing that you cant be silenced, a small satisfaction that justice was served, a small assurance that we are getting somewhere, and a big, big knowing that you are important, unquestionably, you are untouchable, you are beautiful, you are to be valued, respected, undeniably, every minute of every day, you are powerful and nobody can take that away from you. Its like if you were to read an article where a car was hit, and found dented, in a ditch. You cannot give me back my sleepless nights. But what time did you do that? Most importantly, thank you to the two men who saved me, who I have yet to meet. Brock Turner was convicted of three felony counts of sexual assault and was sentenced to six months in jail for the January 2015 assault, although the crime carried a maximum of 14 years in prison. [33], Miller's assault story and the legal case "sparked a nationwide discussion about rape on college campuses and how survivors were not being heard",[34][35] and "became part of the intense debates around rape, sexism and sexual misconduct over the past years," including the Me Too movement. Miller said that night she could "finally soften, exhale" with the weight of the secret no longer on her shoulders. Now Learn Her Name", "Glamour Women of the Year: Stanford Sexual Assault Case Survivor Emily Doe Speaks Out", "Once an unnamed sexual assault victim, Chanel Miller accepts Woman of the Year award this time, herself", "The Best Moments From Glamour's 2019 Women of the Year Awards", "Chanel Miller on Time magazine's 100 next list", Facing public pressure, Stanford decides to install plaque with Chanel Miller's words, Victim Impact Statement as Published by Buzzfeed, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Chanel_Miller&oldid=1116511064, This page was last edited on 16 October 2022, at 23:35. I fought everyday for you. I wonder if kissing was just faces sloppily pressed up against each other? It doesnt make sense. In fact, two Swedish graduate students named Carl-Fredrik Arndt and Peter Jonsson noticed him on top of her and then intervened scene. It felt serious. At Brock Turner's sentencing in March 2016, Chanel Miller read a statement aloud to him in court describing the "severe impact" the . The accuser initially convicted of three felony counts of sexual assault. Did you party at frats? To listen to your attorney attempt to paint a picture of me, the face of girls gone wild, as if somehow that would make it so that I had this coming for me. No one can talk me out of the hurt he caused me. In her new memoir, "Know My Name," Miller describes how she went to a frat party with her little sister in January 2015, blacked out, and woke up in the hospital with no memory of the assault. Chanel Miller it feels important to write her full name more than once because the public spent years talking about her without it went to a party at Stanford University in 2015 and ended up in a hospital, unsure how she had gotten there. Instead of taking time to heal, I was taking time to recall the night in excruciating detail, in order to prepare for the attorneys questions that would be invasive, aggressive, and designed to steer me off course, to contradict myself, my sister, phrased in ways to manipulate my answers. But where exactly? My damage was internal, unseen, I carry it with me. Key points: The 2016 trial found Brock Turner attacked her while she lay unconscious It also introduces readers to an extraordinary writer, one whose words have already changed our world. Chanel Miller Victim Impact Statement - Chanel Miller Letter - Chanel Miller Statement. Twelve jurors convicted you guilty of three felony counts beyond reasonable doubt, thats twelve votes per count, thirty six yeses confirming guilt, thats one hundred percent, unanimous guilt. My boyfriend did not know what happened, but called that day and said, I was really worried about you last night, you scared me, did you make it home okay? I was horrified. You bought me a ticket to a planet where I lived by myself. Where did you urinate? You were wrong for doing what nobody else was doing, which was pushing your erect dick in your pants against my naked, defenseless body concealed in a dark area, where partygoers could no longer see or protect me, and my own sister could not find me. Would you ever cheat? That I am not just a drunk victim at a frat party found behind a dumpster, while you are the All American swimmer at a top university, innocent until proven guilty, with so much at stake. The probation officers recommendation of a year or less in county jail is a soft timeout, a mockery of the seriousness of his assaults, an insult to me and all women. Who dropped you off at this party? The Probation Officer has stated that this case, when compared to other crimes of similar nature, may be considered less serious due to the defendants level of intoxication. The probation officer weighed the fact that he has surrendered a hard earned swimming scholarship. And then, at the bottom of the article, after I learned about the graphic details of my own sexual assault, the article listed his swimming times. She stopped behind a dumpster where Turner began to rape her. And even after that, my family had to listen to your attorney say the pictures were after the fact, we can dismiss them. The judge in the case, Aaron Persky, was recalled in 2018 because of the outrage over Turners sentence. Currently, he lives in Ohio with his parents. He said he didnt know why we were behind a dumpster. When the policeman arrived and interviewed the evil Swede who tackled you, he was crying so hard he couldnt speak because of what hed seen. My testimony was weak, was incomplete, and I was made to believe that perhaps, I am not enough to win this. According to a source, Miller was drunk at that time and even unconscious. Again, I do not have words for these feelings. Meanwhile, Brock Turner is the literal face of rape in a college legal textbook. You do not get to pretend that there were no red flags. View Chris Miller's professional profile on LinkedIn. I showed up an hour late to work every morning, excused myself to cry in the stairwells, I can tell you all the best places in that building to cry where no one can hear you. My brain was talking my gut into not collapsing. After high school, Chris entered Texas Tech University where he played baseball as a left-handed pitcher and was a member of the Phi Delta Theta fraternity. Know My Name will be distributed by Viking publications on September 24, 2019. Miller graduated from the University of California, Santa Barbara, with a degree in literature, according to her publisher. She was found breathing, unresponsive with her underwear six inches away from her bare stomach curled in fetal position. I couldn't say any more, stood smiling like an insane person.". She did not know that beneath my sweatsuit, I had scratches and bandages on my skin, my vagina was sore and had become a strange, dark color from all the prodding, my underwear was missing, and I felt too empty to continue to speak. But then I realized, it would have happened, just to somebody else. Chanel was inspired by her mother's early endeavors as a writer and contemplated on pursuing a similar career path. She has a younger sister. Are you sexually active with him? Brock had a strange new story, almost sounded like a poorly written young adult novel with kissing and dancing and hand holding and lovingly tumbling onto the ground, and most importantly in this new story, there was suddenly consent. He became the first judge to be recalled in California since 1932. All the best things to do, to see, and discuss in the San Francisco Bay Area! Her victim impact statement was posted on BuzzFeed, where it instantly went viralviewed by eleven million people within four days, it was translated globally and read on the floor of Congress; it inspired changes in California law and the recall of the judge in the case. She has a younger sister. Miller, known then only as "Emily Doe," became the center of a high-profile criminal case when she was assaulted outside a Stanford fraternity party in 2015. Thats the difference. You said, Being drunk I just couldnt make the best decisions and neither could she. Instead he took the risk of going to trial, added insult to injury and forced me to relive the hurt as details about my personal life and sexual assault were brutally dissected before the public. Hes in the clear. Chanel was born to her father, Chris Miller who is a retired therapist, and her mother May Miller, a Chinese immigrant who is also an author. To girls everywhere, I am with you. You were about to enter four years of access to drunk girls and parties, and if this is the foot you started off on, then it is right you did not continue. She's since met the pair for dinner. The nurse said there had been abrasions, lacerations, and dirt in my genitalia. For the first time since her 2015 sexual assault, she is telling her story not from behind a curtain of anonymity, but as herself - attributed and for the record - in the. 163 posts. I had no power, I had no voice, I was defenseless. Instinctively and immediately, I wanted to take away her pain. While you worry about your shattered reputation, I refrigerated spoons every night so when I woke up, and my eyes were puffy from crying, I would hold the spoons to my eyes to lessen the swelling so that I could see. Access your favorite topics in a personalized feed while you're on the go. How many times did you black out? But here we are. Had Brock admitted guilt and remorse and offered to settle early on, I would have considered a lighter sentence, respecting his honesty, grateful to be able to move our lives forward. I was asked to sign papers that said Rape Victim and I thought something has really happened. See one thing we have in common is that we were both unable to get up in the morning. To calm me down, they said its just the flora and fauna, flora and fauna. Were you wearing your cardigan? Her powerful words spread sparked discussion about rape on college campuses. Chanel Miller Early Life Story, Family Background and Education. Turner would ultimately serve only three months behind bars. Where did Chanel Miller Grow Up? Thousands wrote to say that she had given them the courage to share their own experiences of assault for the first time., The publisher added, Now she reclaims her identity to tell her story of trauma, transcendence, and the power of words. I have to relearn that I am not fragile, I am capable, I am wholesome, not just livid and weak. Chanel Miller was born and raised in Palo Alto, California, as the daughter of Chris Miller and May May Miller, a documentary filmmaker. Miller jumped into the spotlight back in 2015. My damage was internal, unseen, I carry it with me. So never stop fighting, I believe you. Wikipedia: Sexual Assault Survivor, Chanel Miller was born in 1993 in Palo Alto, California, USA. I called myself big mama, because I knew Id be the oldest one there. You probably know Chanel Miller as Emily Doe. Chanel drank alcohol to the point of blacking out. It is another thing to have someone ruthlessly working to diminish the gravity of validity of this suffering. Top editors give you the stories you want delivered right to your inbox each weekday. Brock stated, At no time did I see that she was not responding. If a first time offender from an underprivileged background was accused of three felonies and displayed no accountability for his actions other than drinking, what would his sentence be? What container did you drink out of? 157 following. In 2016, she gained extensive media attention after she confronted Brock Turner (former swimmer) with a powerful statement during his sentencing. and the father of three (3) sons, 40, 36, and 22, and a daughter, 21. You said, I stupidly thought it was okay for me to do what everyone around me was doing, which was drinking. She is also a public speaker. The book won the 2019 National Book Critics Circle Award for Autobiographies and was named in several national book lists of the year. If I told them, I would see the fear on their faces, and mine would multiply by tenfold, so instead I pretended the whole thing wasnt real. I assure you my rewards program is non transferable, especially to any nameless man that approaches me. Viking I fought everyday for you. I did not say he does not deserve to be behind bars. Not awareness about campus sexual assault, or rape, or learning to recognize consent. I could not imagine my family having to read about this online. The US woman who read a searing statement at the sentencing of the college swimmer who sexually assaulted her at Stanford University in 2015 causing a public outcry that led to a judge being recalled has revealed her identity. in literature from UC Santa Barbara. Nobody. Turner's father said his son is paying a "steep price" for what he characterized as "20 minutes of action." "It was insulting," Miller said. Sipping fireball is not your crime. You knocked down both our towers, I collapsed at the same time you did. To conclude, I want to say thank you. Moreover, she penned a new book to raise awareness and how sexually assaulted people are not being heard. Chanel Miller (born in 1993) is an American Author, Artist, Former Volleyball Player, and Controversial Personality from Palo Alto, California. The isolation at times was unbearable. How fast Brock swims does not lessen the severity of what happened to me, and should not lessen the severity of his punishment. You didnt even stop when I was unconscious anyway! Sienna Miller PICTURE EXCLUSIVE: Actress, 37, confirms romance with gallery owner Lucas Zwirner, 28, as they pack on the PDA in NYC By Rebecca Lawrence For Mailonline Published: 12:09 EST, 14. Brock Turner had been sentenced to just six months in county jail after he was found sexually assaulting her on Stanfords campus. I was awake, right? Nobody wins. To say, yes her nurse confirmed there was redness and abrasions inside her, significant trauma to her genitalia, but thats what happens when you finger someone, and hes already admitted to that. Colton Michael Miller was 18 months old when his father, Christopher Michael Miller, shot and killed him on Sept. 21, 2019. She has a younger sister. When you are nineteen, you are old enough to pay the consequences for attempting to rape someone. Why were you going to this party? Because my gut was saying, help me, help me. Along with her book, Miller also sat down for an interview with 60 Minutes that will air later in September, and read part of her statement on video. He said you had an erection, because it was cold. It was read in full on TV by CNNs Ashleigh Banfield and on the floor of the House of Representatives by members of Congress, who took turns reading sections. [3] Miller was referred to as "Emily Doe" in court documents and media reports until September 2019, when she relinquished her anonymity and released her memoir Know My Name: A Memoir. I have lost weight from stress, when people would comment I told them Ive been running a lot lately. On nights when you feel alone, I am with you. a sister (name not available). I should have never been touched in the first place. We were both drunk, the difference is I did not take off your pants and underwear, touch you inappropriately, and run away. I tried to push it out of my mind, but it was so heavy I didnt talk, I didnt eat, I didnt sleep, I didnt interact with anyone. So one year later, as predicted, a new dialogue emerged. Your attorney has repeatedly pointed out, well we dont know exactly when she became unconscious. Miller is a lifelong illustrator. Chris Miller filed pre-candidacy paperwork with the West Virginia Secretary of State's Office this week, declaring his intention to raise funds for a gubernatorial campaign in 2024. Chanel also has a younger sister whose name is unknown to the public, as per the wishes of the family. How much do you usually drink? her gentle father, who cooks a meal of broccoli and quinoa for Tiffany, Miller, and Tiffany's . Chris was reared in Dallas, TX where he graduated from Lake Highlands High School in 1990. Campus Sexual Assault. Now shes revealing her name, face, and voice. By clicking Sign up, you agree to receive marketing emails from Insider It was cruel math for the 22-year-old victim, Chanel Miller, known publicly only as "Emily Doe" throughout the trial. [16][17] When Turner tried to flee, he was caught and held down on the ground by the two graduate students as they waited for police to arrive. Do you remember silencing it? But apparently I granted full permission. Every time a new article come out, I lived with the paranoia that my entire hometown would find out and know me as the girl who got assaulted. [32], In 2020, a mural drawn by Miller appeared in the Asian Art Museum in San Francisco. Somehow, you still dont get it. In January of 2015, a 23-year-old woman was . I learned what happened to me the same time everyone else in the world learned what happened to me. 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